August 14, 2003

A friend sent me this list yesterday. It’s also known as the “Top 10 Conservative Catholic Pickup Lines.” (I don’t know the author, so it’s here unattributed, but appreciated.)

10. May I offer you a light for that votive candle?

9. Hi there! My buddy and I were wondering if you would settle a dispute we’re having. Do you think the word should be pronounced home-school-ing, or

8. Sorry, but I couldn't help notice how cute you look in that knee-length, shapeless, plaid jumper.

7. What's a nice girl like you doing at a First Saturday Rosary Cenacle like this?

6. You don't like the culture of death, either? Wow! We have so much in common!

5. Let's get out of here. I know a much cozier little Catholic bookstore downtown.

4. I bet I can guess your confirmation name.

3. You've got stunning scapular-brown eyes.

2. Did you feel what I felt when we reached into the holy water font at the same time?

1. Confess here often?

And don’t forget, friends, tomorrow is the Solemnity of the Assumption of the Virgin Mary, a holy day of obligation. (As a kid I really resented this day. I mean, an HDO in the middle of summer? What a pain.)


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