December 03, 2002

Today: The Bush Twins

The quips that would be circling the web and repeated by every short-sleeved goon at Friday evening happy hours nationwide if there really were such a thing as “the liberal media” and Rush Limbaugh were a Democrat and not a right-wing Republican:

Why is Jenna Bush so ugly?

Because Ann Coulter is her real father and Senator-elect Rep. Lindsey Graham (R-S.C.) is her real mother.

Why is Barbara Bush (the younger) so ugly?

Because Norah Vincent is her real father and George H.W. Bush is her real mother.

Which I guess means they’re not really twins after all.

[Note: Tweaked post-publication for clarity and tone.]


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